It's funny the things people say on T.V these days.
Anyway. I was surprised to find myself at a church retreat all weekend, and even more surprised at the events that transpired there. Who knew church camp included hyms, bible verses and ruined relationships. I won't go into any detail, but to all the men in the world:
You are a frustrating and infuriating gender, no matter how adorable you are.
This has been a message from yours truly.
Also, the worst part of all this is that the second party is really nice, so I can't even hate her. It makes it much harder to be bitter.
On another note, being 16 is cool. So much is opened to you, and you can justify it with three words and a number. "It's because I'm 16."
Driving to do list:
-Find car
-Find adult willing to teach me to drive
-Find an empty stretch of pavement that I can't injure anything on
I've been busy packing, to make the hard, grueling move to the building next door. The short distance almost makes it more obnoxious. However, the move is very very very needed. Like, even though I'd rather get roundhouse kicked to the face by Chuck Norris than move, I know that we need to go go goooo.
I literally just sat here for a full minute trying to figure out what's wrong with me. You know that feeling where theres a lead weight on your chest, and you can't do anything but lay there and hope for relief? Kinda like theres static in your ears and you can't hear anything around it? I got it baddd. I've been in a slump lately. Nothing seems to be going right, and even during good situations, it feels like I can't even enjoy it. Maybe I'm going crazy. Probably because I'm 16.
Maybe when we've moved and that big dark looming cloud of stress is gone I'll feel better.
On the plus side? Well, I don't really have a plus side, so here's some Chuck Norris jokes. I'm gonna go cry into my ramen now.
-There is no 'ctrl' button on Chuck Norris's computer. Chuck Norris is always in control.
-Apple pays Chuck Norris 99 cents every time he listens to a song.
-Chuck Norris destroyed the periodic table, because he only recognizes the element of surprise.
-Chuck Norris uses pepper spray to spice up his steaks.
-Chuck Norris can kill two stones with one bird.
-Chuck Norris is the reason why Waldo is hiding.
-Chuck Norris sold his soul to the devil for his rugged good looks and unparalleled martial arts ability. Shortly after the transaction was finalized, Chuck roundhouse kicked the devil in the face and took his soul back. The devil, who appreciates irony, couldn't stay mad and admitted he should have seen it coming. They now play poker every second Wednesday of the month.
-Chuck Norris has already been to Mars; that's why there are no signs of life there.
-Chuck Norris is currently suing NBC, claiming Law and Order are trademarked names for his left and right legs.
-Chuck Norris is what Willis was talking about
-If you have five dollars and Chuck Norris has five dollars, Chuck Norris has more money than you.
-When Chuck Norris had surgery, the anesthesia was applied to the doctors.
-Chuck Norris can touch MC Hammer.
-When Chuck Norris crosses the street, the cars have to look both ways.
-Chuck Norris can beat the sun in a staring contest.
-When Chuck Norris runs with scissors other people get hurt.
-Chuck Norris frequently donates blood to the Red Cross. Just never his own.
Okay I'll stop.
Love,
Megan
