Monday, January 31, 2011

MOOOOOOOOOOOOOOONDAY

is today, if you haven't noticed.

You're welcome.

Anyway. I've been 18 for a week now, and it's been pretty awesome. For some odd reason, saying you're 18 is so much more badass than having to admit you're 17. Don't ask me why, I'm just another victim of the badassness.

Exams are also over, which is awesome plus 5. To be fair, I only had two exams. I was expecting four, but then two of my teachers were all, "Naww, the culminating was your exam. Feel free to laugh at every Facebook friend that sets their status to something whiny about having to write four exams."

Well, that may not have been their exact words, but semantics, really.

So, what does a student do when they have a week off before the next semester swings in? They become useless lumps on the couch, that's what!

This particular lump has been logging a LOT of quality time with their favorite Winchesters.

I know I talk about Supernatural a lot, which makes it seem like I have no life. I don't, but that's not the point. Have you seen Jensen Ackles? He's like sexy time for your corneas. Who am I to deny my corneas their daily quotient of super-mega-foxy-awesome-hotness?

That was totally a refrence to A Very Potter Musical. You're free to tell me I'm the most awesome person on Earth, I don't mind.

I mean, don't get me wrong, Jared is also an upstanding citizen of sexy town, but his last name is much harder to spell, and I'm a Dean girl. Too bad.

Anyway.I've noticed that in life, there are a damn lot of awkward moments. Many of which I will talk about later, I'm sure.

One such awkward moment is the sex scene. Watching a sex scene with anyone else in the room is generally an awkward experience. Unless you're watching porn (Which I can legally buy now, not that I would) with your significant and sweaty other. That's a different story.

So. Sex scene comes on (pun). It's all noisy and nekkid. You have three options. One option is to stare at the screen like this


And once the scene is over, you can pull your face back into a normal expression and pretend it never happened. It's a viable option, to be fair.

Your other two options are slightly less amusing to watch, but never fear. I got your biz-ack.

One method is to talk over the scene about ANYTHING but what's happening on screen. Bunnies, bullet wounds, Star Trek, anything. They'll never notice how awkward things are if you've started a rousing (pun) conversation about the pros and cons of getting your teeth replaced with teeth made of 24 carat gold. (If you can convince someone that gold teeth are a good thing, you get an automatic pass to be ruler of the world. That's persuasion to the power of awesome.)

The second, and my favorite method of undoing the awkward, is to treat the sex scene more like a spectator sport. Grade the scene, and call out scores for different moves. Something like, "Oh SNAP 6.0 FOR THE FACE CARESS!" Works like a charm, I swear.

Anyway. I have to go watch Sam be locked in a panic room and go through withdrawal from demon blood. No biggie.

Adieuuuu.

Love,
Megan

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